Plants and Animals

Fact Check Did a Scuba Diver Get Their Penis Stuck In a Giant Clam

Fact Check Did a Scuba Diver Get Their Penis Stuck In a Giant Clam

It pays to be aware of what you dump your trash into as mortal animals. The story of a diver who dared to go where no man had gone before by placing his penis into a big clam, only to have his shellfish allergy activated by the tragic experience exemplifies this point. 

The story, on the other hand, is exactly that: a story. If you want to call it that, it is a piece of interspecies erotic fiction. That is not to say we cannot learn something from it, the most important of which is to leave the clams alone. The legend stems from a tale published on the World News Daily Report website, a satirical news site that requires readers to read a disclaimer at the bottom of every piece.

“World News Daily Report accepts full responsibility for the satirical tone of its publications, as well as their fictitious content. All characters in this website’s articles – including those based on real persons – are completely fictitious, and any resemblance between them and any living, dead, or undead person is totally coincidental.”

Sean Madison, 22, died while scuba diving on a comedown from Gamma Hydroxybutyrate, often known as GHB (the substance that inspired cooked egg butt activities), and ecstasy, according to a bogus news report published in March 2018. 

The youthful and sexually active fictional diver proceeded to place his penis into a gigantic clam despite his memory loss, only to discover that “it just wouldn’t let go.”

Madison was ultimately able to remove himself from the clam, but he developed a serious allergic response that required treatment at Ka’u Hospital in Hawaii. While no such patient admission occurred, the satirical news site’s image depicts the results of a forced animal contact in typical Florida Man fashion. According to a Snopes debunking article, the photo depicts Austin Hatfield, an 18-year-old from Wimauma, Florida, who attempted to kiss a cottonmouth snake. Cottonmouths are poisonous pit vipers; therefore kissing them is a bad idea since their venom includes enzymes that degrade tissue, causing harm and inflammation.

Hatfield’s bloated complexion is due to the inflammation, which is comparable to the swelling observed in people suffering from anaphylaxis after an allergic response. I hear you question, “What type of reaction do you get when you poke your peen in shellfish?”

This is not the case. However, be forewarned…If you are looking for stories of genuine penile agony, someone was admitted to the hospital after attempting to measure the length of theirs with a USB cord. While membership drawbacks (according to these penis owners), it is an appendage worth caring for and not something you want to throw away.